Observation.

According to my mother, "It is so windy in South Dakota today that Tucker almost blew away on his walk."

So, its been awhile.
And now I'm stuck.
The amount of things that have occurred over the past five months is similar to the amount of times Iran has come under fire for it's nuclear weapon program.
Speaking of which:  http://hamsayeh.net/world/2382-sources-us-and-israel-close-to-approving-iran-strike.html
Intense, huh? - International Conflicts are so neat.
At any rate. There are a few things that I have learned that I do think need to be shared.

** There is a reason why there is no mention of summer 2012.  Here are the highlights:
Four days after returning to South Dakota for the Summer, I left to spend a week in North Dakota to spend time with my best friend.  - If this doesn't give readers an idea of how much I love South Dakota, I am not sure what will.  At any rate, after returning from my "vacation" I entered into my fifth year of employment at the one and only, Hillcrest Aquatic Center. Flatly, I disliked every moment of that job EXCEPT for the children I taught swimming lessons to.  I could go on for days about the awesome children I had taught.  Ernest, Tristina, Matthew, William, Chase, Taylor, Keegan.... Just to name a few.  Man, there is nothing like sitting in your lifeguard chair and being summoned down below by a former or present student: "MISS SOPHIA!!!! HI!!!"  You can't help but smile.  There are multiple reasons why I disliked working at the HAC this past summer, but to be honest, why reflect on the poor experiences?  It is over now, and that's that.  I mean, I thank all of those who actually did their job, but I cannot thank the latter, because those individuals are who made my summer hell.  Don't worry though, I'm over it. 

So that's that.

A.  American University.
I've always had the ambition to study at American University, every since I found out their "International Law and Organizations" program existed.  I applied and I got in.  But little did I know that that wasn't even going to be half the battle in pursuit my dreams.  Ripon College had always marketed their study abroad opportunities as: "The tuition differences between the institutions that you will attend while abroad are covered."  It kills me to have to note the fallacy in my own institution's marketing strategies.  This is simply not the case.    I was smacked in the face by the reality of the situation when I found out that that the tuition of American University was over $19k for a semester.  Yup.  That's right folks.  $19,000 for a semester.  Ripon, without financial aid is a little over $14k a semester.  With financial aid, grants, and scholarships ($12) I only pay $2k per semester. But here is the kicker.  My financial aid that was granted to me, was only granted to me based on Ripon's $14k semester.  Because my institution doesn't reevaluate FAFSA on a semester by semester basis, my $12k is all that I get to apply to my new price tag of a school, $19k.  Oh, but hold on, don't forget to take $1000 out of that $12,000 because work study money cannot be granted by Ripon College to be applied to American University.  What's 19-11?  $8,000 dollars folks.  EIGHT THOUSAND DOLLARS.  And then that feeling sinks in that you might not get to chase your dream after all.  I truly do take the blame for not being away of these expenses, though.  It was nothing short of my fault.  We'll just have to see where everything else goes from here I suppose.  I applied for the Dean's Scholarship that is offered to abroad students via, AU.  Let's hope that makes a good enough dent in what I'll have to ultimately have to take a loan out for.

B. Forensics
So the plan was simple.  Qualify all of the events before the spring semester, fly back to nationals, come time, and perform.  Until you realize that you won't be in the country for nationals.  You know, all of a sudden all of the things that I have to talk about just seem so petty.  But I'll proceed.  The degree to which my forensics world shifted was massive.  Now, coaching more than performing is the trend.  I don't mind it, but I miss performing.  Now I feel like the question of "If you miss it, why don't you perform anyways?" must be asked.  And to be honest, I don't know how to answer the question.  I don't want to be lowly, and note that, I compete with the goal of getting to nationals, once that goal is not longer available, I have to prioritize and move on to different things.  But really, is that answer so lowly?  The opportunity to go to D.C. in the first place is once in a life time.  Somethings just get stuck in your brain and therefore all you can do is think and think and think about it.  It is what it is.

C. Student Senate
There are A LOT of different things that I have learned from Senate.  Respect, may actually be the 'thing' that holds the most merit, presently.  After assuming the position of treasurer for one more semester, I didn't think that I would be getting myself into half of the things that I plowed right into.  I learned that there are too many individuals who do not know what respect is.  One of the biggest issues this semester has been senator accountability.  Essentially, are senators doing their job and talk to their constituents?  Apparently not.  You know, it is tough to be on the executive board and not be able to say anything and not have the ability to have your voice heard.  But that is another things that I have learned, sitting and watching the senate resolve the issues that its starts, is actually quite nice.  It is very interesting to see the different ways that people engage in discourse, more specifically, how they handle arguments, personal attacks, or stigma in a room.  All of these components are what senate has been comprised of lately.  Karl Rove was the hot topic in Student Senate.  A $15,000 one-fund request. (A one-fund request is a financial request that a group presents to student senate in order to receive funds for projects, speakers, meetings, etc.  Student has one lump sum of money called the "one-fund" and that is where the money comes out of when a one-fund is presented and passed.  The one-fund gets its money from the $250 student activity fee that each of our students have to pay.)  Karl Rove passed the first time it had been presented, with quite a bit of outcry to follow the decision that senators had made.  Constituents were furious with neglect of their senators to truly explain what was going on to them.  A "reform senate" Facebook group was even formed.  Then we found out that there was a scheduler mistake on Rove's behalf, and found out that he couldn't not come to campus to preach political advocacy until AFTER the Presidential Election. Because this had never happened when any of us had been in senate, exec board and the group of the Rove one-fund proposal met and agreed to reconsider the Karl Rove one-fund.  Once again, on a 13-10 vote, the one-fund passed. And again, scrutiny became a thing again.  If only you knew.


I see it like this: Students who do not engage in or care about senate are finally realizing they should care, only after the fact of their, "neglect" to care, doesn't give them what they want.  For example, to your typical apathetic student, receiving an email with "Senate" in its subject probably isn't the most appealing thing to read.  At the beginning of the year, people didn't care.  And now, all of a sudden, people care.  And I like that.  I don't criticize either party, senate or constituent, because all of this is sooo good, but the problem is, I don't think people are being respectful enough to understand it.  If you have a constituent coming to a senate meeting saying that a senator ignored a petition with a majority of signatures not supporting Karl Rove coming to campus, and voting in favor of Karl Rove instead, at the bottom line, there is a problem.  But, not being accountable for your actions, and looking at reasons of justification for your decision instead of recognizing that wrong is simply, unethical.  In my opinion, what is even more unethical is eluding to the fact that your actions were okay.  I guess I was just raised differently than those at the end of the table who are under the impression that all senators do a good job.

Something else that has come from senate, is the realization of how close an executive board can grow in times of hardships.  I want everyone to know that the people who sit at the head of the table deal with way more things regarding senate that ANY of the students on senate.  This is fact.  Please, respect the executive board and the things we go through to make everything try and run as smoothly as possible.  Furious emails directed to our adviser or board do not make the situation any better, "You should have do this," "Why didn't you send an email out to remind the seniors to vote for class board?" <-- My response to all of this? You come and commit the time and effort that we do, and you come and engage in the debates we have around the exec table meetings, and then you tell me if what we are or not doing are valid.  And honestly, with the senior class board thing.  I'm sorry that your fellow class doesn't care enough to pay attention to elections, but to a certain degree, we cannot prevent that from happening.  If you wanted seniors to go and vote in the commons, YOU send an email out, as a candidate for elections, explaining the importance of voting in the election.  Take a look through the senate exec board's glasses before you harbor scrutiny.              

At the end of the day, when it comes down to senate, the discourse is good, the respect could be better, and the attitudes of pompous beings should be harbored.      

On a happier note, nature.  Specifically fall. So beautiful.  I think when I grow up I want my home to have all of the warm colors of fall.  I'm especially drawn to maroon and brown and the dark yellows and oranges, and of course, the blaze red too. <-- That's like all of the fall colors, haha so I guess there is no "especially" because I like them all! :]

Importance of observation. - After all, it is the title of this piece of work, isn't it.  I think there is one important thing we ought to do in this world and we can't ever forget about it.  We have to sit back and observe every once in a while. Look at things from a different perspective, respect the individual(s) who present the latter perspective, and be open to changing your views.  This is one of the only ways we can continue to grow as a human race.  We need empathy, not apathy.  More understanding and less justification for the past. 

Now comes the portion where literature is directed to one person specifically, but is informational enough to apply to a general audience.  Here you go, dude.

My suggestion to you is this.  If you aren't ready for a relationship, don't get yourself involved, in any way shape or form, with anyone.  You don't know how that will affect them in the long run, you know?  I mean, for goodness sake.  To have such gusto and faith in something potentially happening, and then convincing yourself that you need to say "no" instead of "yes" can really crush the other person on the other end.  And granted, those of you reading this won't fully understand the circumstances of which I experienced, but at the end of the day, please recognize that I really am not trying to be selfish or insensitive.  I just really want people to understand the importance of committing yourself to someone knowing full well that they are willing to do what ever it takes to make things work, is hard to find these days.  And I think, the small way we can change this is by trusting yourself the first time.  Follow the instinct that made you feel positive about this FIRST.  Don't follow the instinct that you've morphed, convinced, and skewed, and denied.  Don't let two weeks get in the way of establishing an equilibrium that hadn't even been given the chance to be established in the first place.  Timing can be wrong, but try again.   Take a chance and don't be afraid.  Because until then you will have to sit and realize that you missed out on. 

You know, I look back on this post and see a lot of complaints, but to be honest, when you ask someone what is going on in life, and how they are doing, or now is school, no one is going to give you this entire answer.  Your answer is going to be "Yeah, school's fine" "Yeah mom, I'm fine thanks." "Yup! Just trying to survive in this world".  I sometimes think I am bothering people when I do give them the what I refer to as the, "blog" answer, or, a small synopsis of what is going on and not the "Yeah everything is good" answer.  Perhaps that's why I don't engage in heavy personal discussion anymore, nowadays.  Food for thought I suppose.

To end, here are a list of things that I am thankful for.  I know Thanksgiving isn't a thing quite yet, but with a few more days remaining until then, I may as well write it down anyways, after all, we shouldn't just be thankful on the one day they tell us to be.  Be thankful for everything and everyone you have in your life.

1. Three amazing paid internships: Sorenson Law Office, National Forensic League, and Ripon College's Ethical Leadership Program. 
2. Amazing Mentors/Professors/RC Faculty.
3. Amazing Friends - You know who you are.
4. A family I wouldn't trade for ANYTHING.
5. The Alumni who donate who make my pursuit of a higher education possible.

At the end of the day, there will be things that you'll bitch about, that you won't like, or that don't go your way.  But take a chance to observe the things around you and realize, that things truly aren't that bad.

Stay warm,

-S

No Specifics

Casual. (A South Dakota Summer 2012)

This time there will be no specifics.  No topic of interest, none of that.  Just pleasure.  I'm sitting in my backyard in South Dakota and it is 81 degrees.  I legitimately try to be outside as much as possible.  Why waste beautiful days?  Also, blogging on my computer outside is fun.  Grass gets stuck in my fan and it makes a neat noise under my computer. Simple Joys.  Speaking of which:  My dog, Tucker, who is supposed to be on the deck, has escaped to come and sit next to me in the grass.  He comes, sneezes on me, and begins rolling in the grass.  Tucker, rolls and rolls and rolls, then plops down next to me, satisfied.  He lays with me in the sun for a good 5 minutes, then realizes that he is significantly hotter than he was 5 minutes ago.  He moves to the shade on the deck.  The life of a dog.  As Tucker meanders back to the deck, I tune into the sounds I can hear.  Birds. Shingles.  Dog collar.  Squirrel crunching a peanut shell.  Wind chimes.  Home.  Although, I don't feel like this is home any more.  Sure, the family is together and such.  However, I feel more like a guest here than I would in Ripon.  I'm sure we all expereince that though, so I guess I'll just go with the flow.

 I've had some time on my hands.  Enough time to watch a few clips and read a few quotations.  Here is some of the neatness that I experienced:

"We all know the function of the media has never been to eliminate the evils of the world, no. Their job is to persuade us to accept those evils and get used to living with them. They want us to be passive observers." 

 - I couldn't have said it better myself.  The media grinds my gears.  And I don't want to go into too much detail, in the fear of sounding uneducated, however, let's be real for a moment.  Persuasion and Mass Media has taught me one thing.  You can't trust the media.  Agenda-setting, priming, and framing link together like a chain.  Dominating what is broadcasted, what side to take, and what takes priority is not left up to the ordinary citizen, but rather the oh so cool people who are in charge of CNN or Fox.  Enough is enough, I will not go any further. But, I will say this: we have got to realize that we're being conditioned on a mass scale. Start challenging this corporate slave state.

"It's like you come onto this planet with a crayon box. Now, you may get the 8-pack, you may get the 16-pack. But it's all in what you do with the crayons, the colors that you're given. And don't worry about drawing within the lines or coloring outside the lines. I say color outside the lines. You know what I mean? Color right off the page."

- Here's my thought. The first part of this quotation, "It's like you come onto this planet with a crayon box.  Now, you may be the 8-pack, you may be the 16-pack.  But it's all in what you do with the crayons, the colors that you're given." is absolutely true.  It is all about what you do with the colors you are given.  Everyone has different circumstances, some more fortunate than others, but that doesn't mean that those who aren't as fortunate don't get the the opportunity to succeed.  You just have to try a little harder.  In turn, you would have a true reason to feel gratified.  There, that's something else that grinds my gears.  We're all fully aware that you get by because of the people you know.  It pays to know someone.  Which is interesting, especially for those of us who do not know anyone.... Don't worry, if I started from the bottom, you can too. - However, the latter part of the quotation, ""And don't worry about drawing within the lines or coloring outside the lines.  I say color outside the lines.  You know what I mean? Color right off the page."  THIS is what is so thought provoking.  While society tells us that there are boundaries that we mustn't cross, we need to cross them.  We, as a society, need to go against then norm, be inovative, be unique, and be different.  Again, this all starts with you.  Be who you want to be.  Love who and what you want to.  And most importantly, don't be afraid to embrace who you truly are. 

Coming back to the place where you grew up can be the highlight of your summer, or just the lamest part of summer.  For me, it is the lamest.  I'm not going to complain about my family, my job, or anything else of that nature.  What I will talk about, is the level of competitiveness little Ol' Brookings, South Dakota has.  NO matter who you are, what you own is how you're viewed.  This town is all about material possessions, quality of job, and presentation of self.  It blows.  But it also gives me a sense of what the real world could be all about.  It is harsh.  So what if I don't have a boat that goes 200 mph on the lake?  Shouldn't I be thankful for having a boat in the first place?  I feel as though people in Brookings fail to realize this.  But then again, I could be wrong.  I guess my point with all of this still relates back to the quotation.  Don't fall into the mold.  I know I am not.  I am not going to waste my money on Abercrombie and Fitch, Hollister, and god knows what else just to fit into the "well off" crowd.  I'm going to buy whatever the hell I want.  Judge me for wearing a huge sunhat, I don't care.  I'll judge you for sweating your face full of make-up because you don't have a nice hat to protect you. <-- That was mean, I know.  But you get the point. Moral of the story, color outside the lines.       

"Our planet is facing the greatest problems it's ever faced. Ever. So whatever you do, don't be bored. This is absolutely the most exciting time we could have possibly hoped to be alive. And things are just starting."

- This is for Ripon College's Class of 2012. (And all of the other neat schools' Class of 2012 that all of my other neat senior friends come from.)  And everyone else, college or not, as well.  I've preached about it before and I'll preach about it again, apathy is the worst.  Don't give in.  This is especially relevant because it is summer.  The lazy time of the year when all we have to do is work hard and play harder.  I encourage you to think about what means most to you and why it means the most to you.  I encourage you to be active, to be an activist for whatever you hold dear to your heart.  Because if you don't start caring, who will?  RC's class of 2012, you've accomplished so much in your 4 years at Ripon.  Now, share it with the rest of the world.  Let your knowledge, influence, and experiences shine onto others.  I am so proud of all of my friends who have graduated from both Ripon and every other institution.  You know who you are.

"Never forget who you are, for surely the world won't.  Make it your strength.  Then it can never be your weakness.  Armor yourself in it, and it will never be used to hurt you." - Best closing statement yet.  End of story.

Now, I never disclosed where I got these quotations.  With the exception of the last, these quotations came from "Waking Life" an intriguing movie following a unnamed young man through his dreams, meeting new people, and questioning the universe.  The film focuses on the nature of dreams, consciousness, and existentialism. The reason why I didn't disclose this at first is because some, discredit words when associated with the thought of existentialism.  i did not what that to be the case.  I want people to open their eyes, appreciate the little things, and really question what life is all about.  I mean, why not?  After all, questioning feeds the mind.  Anyway,  I highly recommend this film.  Lucky for you, it is on YouTube.  Just search, "Waking Life" and contemplate. 

There is one final thought that I would like to leave you with:

Person A:  Excuse me.
Person B:  Excuse me.
Person A:  Hey. Could we do that again? I know we haven't met, but I don't want to be an ant, you know? I mean, it's like we go through life with our antennas bouncing off one another, continuously on ant auto-pilot with nothing really human required of us. Stop. Go. Walk here. Drive there. All action basically for survival. All communication simply to keep this ant colony buzzing along in an efficient polite manner. "Here's your change." "Paper or plastic?" "Credit or debit?" "You want ketchup with that?" I don't want a straw, I want real human moments. I want to see you. I want you to see me. I don't want to give that up. I don't want to be an ant, you know?

- I don't want to be an ant, either.

 - Soph

Assuming The World Around Us....

Recently...

This is why I go to school in Wisconsin (Spring 2012)

I have stumbled upon a few topics of interest.  I prefer to start with the one that I hope, opens up some eyes.   And then I guess we'll go from there.

I don't think there is an official, formal way of going about introducing this topic of interest.  I think the title says it all.  We assume the world around us.  Stop and think for a moment.  When are you not making assumptions?  When are you not making assumptions about others, your environment, or events in general?  That's just it.  You never stop making assumptions.  While this is a short, yet simple observation, there is a silent beauty in the things that you do not have to assume.  The best part about not assuming, is the fact that it truly gives you a peace of mind.  You aren't left with wondering if you look okay, why someone else is doing something the way they are doing it, why something appears to be what it is, or anything like that.  Jimney Christmas, folks.  Look at how much we assume.  We are always drawing assumptions either to fit the mold that we believe, or to convince ourselves that something is acceptable.  Why can't the world just think in simpler terms?  Now, now, I am not naive to this world (that's a lie, we all are naive to this world, really) but honestly, I do wish people would think in straightforward simple approach. Let's think about this. What are things in life that we don't assume?  For me, it is nature.  I cannot begin to describe to you  how beautiful I find nature to be.  The most calming concept in the world would involve a camera and a car ride.  Blissfully stopping in then middle of nowhere and snapping shots of nature.  What a beautiful idea.  Writing about it, simply makes me smile.  Sure, you can assume why the colors of a sunset are what they are, but you're not going to question it for the entire duration of your gaze.  You are going to love and embrace the beauty that the sunset has to offer.  End of story.  Plain and simple.  Think about it.

There are things in life that you never expect to have to deal with.  I'll disclose.     

Depression medication, anxiety medication, and alcohol.  A mistake and trend that shouldn't even have been developed.  But it was developed.  Moving on.

She began by stealing the alcohol because she recognized that the people around her, her friends, would not allow her to do such an injustice to herself.  And I can't tell it is a show or not.  We, up until this point, have assumed that she's okay.  "Now that she's on medication, things should be better, right?"  I believed that.  I assumed.  

"I can't live like this, I am worthless, I am worth nothing, I can't live like this" - The screams continue to echo though my head.  She proceeds to drink the alcohol, and thus, making life oh so interesting for not only her, but everyone else that she effects as well.  The yelling.  The screaming.  The wailing.  All of it, made those around her question, "What the hell is going on?"  Walk out the room, find her one the floor in front of her door.  Wailing.  Historically.  And the frightening thing?  This was certainly real life.  This is so real life to those who live on the floor because this is the FOURTH time that this has happened.  And so the comforting begins.  The effort of numerous sisters.  Until, she decides to run away.  She decides to run away in hopes of dying.  She decides to run away.  And I still can't tell if it is all a show.  Before she runs away, we're sitting. We're sitting in her bed, she's crying hysterically, and telling me her pains.  She is telling me about how she has both alcohol and pills and scissors, and she has the power.  Her life is actually in her hands.  I respond.  I'm terrified.  I motivate life, and I think, until she legitimately runs out of the room, that I've been doing a great job to calm her down.  She's out of her bed, we're joking around, and a small sense of peace has come over me.  Apparently not.  So she runs away.  At this point we all are concerned.  I legitimately found the scariest part of this to be the uncertainty.  The uncertainty that when looking for this woman, that I could turn the corner and find her dead.  I could open up a bathroom look behind the shower curtain, and see her dead.  She doesn't understand the emotional distress that she had put everyone through that night.  But that doesn't matter.  So she has run away.  The entirety of campus is searched.  And.  She ends up back in her room. At this point, the hall director is called.  She converses with the suicidal student, and emerges saying "The authorities will be coming." And my thought at this point is, "Thank God, FINALLY."  Finally, this young woman is going to get some help, finally her parents will be notified, and finally, everybody can stop worrying. 

Unfortunately, that never happened.  The police had come because she had been utilizing suicidal language.  The authorities come.  I am telling you now.  If you had been listening to the conversation from the other side of the door, you would be sick.  Absolutely sick.  She's laughing, she's joking around, she is all of a sudden sober enough to comprehend what is going on, she is all of a sudden sober enough to get her way out of the mess that she had created.  This girl, did not get help.  This girl is still going to suffer.  She is going to suffer, we are going to suffer, and She will continue to be miserable.  And as much as I want to give up on her, I want help for her, more than anything else.  I can't even speak to her. I can't look at her, and I can't even begin to think about what I would say to her.  This is one of the biggest double binds that I've ever been in.  I truly wish she would just open herself up to help, I wish someone could take the next step.  I wish I knew what to do. 

On a separate note.  (I apologize, for I must discontinue this story.)  ((But, I think you get the point.))

There is something beautiful about watching people scurry.  It emphasizes the different story that everybody has.  

Life, my friends, is precious.

Cheers. 

The Question of the Hour...

I encourage perspective.  Take a different perspective on things. (Prairie 2012)

 Recently, I was faced with something that I hadn't anticipated on coming across.  Yesterday, I had a conversation with a young man who didn't know what happiness was.  He stated, "Sophia, I don't know how to be happy.  The only thing I know how to do is work.  I don't know how to communicate"  He continued, "I have no friends, I am socially awkward, and I am just frustrated.  I feel like people walk all over me and all I can do is give in because that is all I know how to do."  The hurt in this young man's eyes were furthered by tears rolling down his face.  This young man was struggling.  There were so many components to his outcry that had invoked thought.  I had to pause, and think.  I had to think about what I was going to say to this young man to convince him that change is possible and that the grass is a little greener on the other side.  Oofta.

I thought about how this entire situation started from something so small and so basic.  The inability to communicate.  This led to the inability to make friends.  The led to the inability for this young man to say "No" to the things that he didn't want to commit to.  This is what led the young man to say "Yes" because work is the only thing that he knows how to do.  I have come across too many cases of this.  I have come into contact with people who do not know how to communicate.  This is SO unfortunate.  It hampers the person who cannot communicate, and this hampers the people who correspond with a person who cannot communicate. 

Pause.  This post is going to include a couple of thoughts.  First, the ability to communicate. Or I suppose, the inability to communicate.  This also corresponds with another topic, the ability to live the life that YOU want to live.  You are in control.  There we go, there is the moral of this post, YOU are in control.

Play.

I think that the ability to communicate creates the right to be selfish about your own well-being.  Follow me here, for a moment.  I personally think that if you are able to communicate to others, you know what to prioritize.  What needs to be said, what doesn't need to be said, and for what purpose these words do or do not need to be said, are set by what you choose to communicate to others.  After all, and outcry is said because the person communicating is looking for help, looking for a solution, or simply looking for a friend.  Solution, found through communication can be such a mind blowing experience.  What prevents this solution from happening is wall the becomes erected between what you want and what you don't think you can have.  The side that is blocked, that a person can no longer see, is the side that holds what you want. 

This wall certainly exists for the young man I have been referring to.  This wall leads to the inability for him to fight for what he wants, to be selfish for his own well-being.  For him, being selfish about what he wanted never seemed to be an option because he was never able to fully communicate.   

 

My question is, is is wrong to be selfish every once in awhile?  I contend that it isn't.  It isn't at all.  I believe this because I believe that you have control over what you want in your life.  You have control over what you want to pursue and you have control of what you prioritize.

Here is a little excerpt of my thoughts that I feel I need to address as well. 

- There was a letter to the editor publication in our last college newspaper.  It addressed the "inadequacies" of one of our organizations on campus.  The author happened to be apart of the organization that he was criticizing.  The author went on and on and ON about what this organization had been doing that was displeasing, in his opinion.  Here is where I find fault in this author.  This author NEVER once mentions anything what HE himself has done to fix the problems that he sees in this organization.  NEVER once does he say that he has tried to change the way this organization is view on campus, how this organization should change, or what should be fixed for the future.  You know why?  Because he hasn't done ANYTHING to change the organization that he is criticizing.  He doesn't once represent himself as a catalyst, because he can't.  It is such disapproving thing to not take advantage of the ability to change.  I personally have a hard time respecting this letter to the editor because of this reason.  It is one thing to point out the flaws of an organization, it is another to see if YOU yourself have acted in hopes of changing these flaws. PUT ACTIONS TO YOUR WORDS.  If you feel that something needs to be changed, talk about it THEN work towards this change.  Hmph.

I realize now, that that had absolutely nothing to do with what I had been addressing earlier.  But hopefully, you enjoyed the break.     

So what did I eventually end up telling this young man who had tears rolling down his face?  I told him to be selfish.  I told him that if you want something, go for it.  If you don't want to do something don't say yes to the person asking.  You have the ability to say no.  You always have the ability to say no.  I told him that if he wants more friends, embrace his "social awkwardness" and love who you are.  I told him that if he thinks people walk all over him, tell that to their face.  Tell the people who he interacts with that " I am a person too.  I have things to do, places to be, and people to see."  I told him that in order to find happiness, you need to know and act on what you want. I told him, "YOU are in control." I told him to fight for what he wants.

So I suppose my questions to you are this.  Are you communicating?  Are you in control?  Are YOU living the life that YOU want to live?  Let me know.